EPIC Dating: LOVE (Part 2 of 2)

“LOVE”

The world has taken the word "love" and twisted it and misused it very much like the world has perverted sex. Remember it's God's creation and it all started with love. But to understand what love truly is, we need to look into the Word of God.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

So to perfect this LOVE you have to know this love.

You have to have Intimacy with Christ.

The apostle Paul perfectly expresses the purpose of every true follower of Christ:

"That I may know Christ"

Philippians 3:7-11

I once thought these things were valuable, but now I consider them worthless because of what Christ has done. Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ and become one with him. I no longer count on my own righteousness through obeying the law; rather, I become righteous through faith in Christ. For God’s way of making us right with himself depends on faith. I want to know Christ and experience the mighty power that raised him from the dead. I want to suffer with him, sharing in his death, so that one way or another I will experience the resurrection from the dead!

"How can I have a personal relationship with God?"

While many people believe that God is real, many also believe that He is only "watching them from a distance" and has no real desire to know them personally.

Actually, God is very interested in you and desires for you to have a personal relationship with Him. 

Psalm 139:17-18

How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!

So how do you draw near to God in a daily relationship?

Here's 5 Ways:

1. Pray without ceasing.

Do you have a designated "prayer time" each day?

Do you pray while still lying in bed in the morning or during your daily drive. Maybe you routinely take a couple minutes each day or a few minutes before bed.

Having a designated prayer time has its place in the life of a Christian, but it can become a routine and can cause us to lose the sincerity of our intimate moments with God.

So try talking with Him throughout your day. Share your thoughts with Him while getting ready in the morning. Talk with him while you walk through your day. Ask Him to speak to you. Thank Him for the beautiful weather. Spend time alone with Him while you drive. Spend those same moments listening for Him to speak. Prayer can be simple. Challenge yourself to hold loving conversations with God all day long.

Any time you talk with someone honestly and openly, the results will always be a deeper relationship!

2. Go on a "God Watch".

Watch what God is doing around us and get involved in His work. Take a few days to watch God moving and working around you. Keep your eyes open for opportunities He creates for you to share the love of Christ with friends, family or strangers. When you adjust your will to God's will, and you do what He desires, He will use you in ways you never imagined! Matthew 7:7 says "...seek and you shall find, knock and it shall be opened unto you." If you look for Him, you will find Him working all around you. And when you get involved in what God is doing, it will draw you closer to Him.

3. Sing His praises!

The Psalms say that the Lord inhabits the praise of His people, so sing His praises and watch Him draw nearer to you! Spend some time everyday in praise and worship. While driving in your car, turn Klove on or put in your favorite worship CD, and intentionally lift up your voice to the Lord. For just those few moments, give Him your undivided attention.

Psalm 100:1-5

Shout with joy to the Lord, all the earth! Worship the Lord with gladness. Come before him, singing with joy. Acknowledge that the Lord is God! He made us, and we are his. We are his people, the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving; go into his courts with praise. Give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good. His unfailing love continues forever, and his faithfulness continues to each generation.

4. Read His Word.

In order to deepen any relationship, you must get to know the other person.

John 1:1

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God and the Word was God.

So if you want to get to know Him, you must read His Word! Learn His likes and dislikes, His ways and His desires. Familiarize yourself with His promises and His principles.

Take a few moments each day and truly focus on the Word of God. As you read the scriptures, pray and ask Him to reveal Himself to you through His Word, and the Holy Spirit will help you to understand His Word. Then you will be able to apply his Word to your life and share it with others.

Jeremiah 29:11

"For I know the plans I have for you,' says the LORD. 'They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope."

5. Show Him Some Love!

How do we love Christ? By keeping His commandments. It's that simple.

Matthew 22:37-39

Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind. 'This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

And no, its not always easy  but what Christ did for us wasn't easy either! So reach out to your friends and family members. Volunteer in your community, your world.

There's no doubt about whether or not this will deepen your relationship with Christ. As a matter of fact,

John 14:21 assures us it will.

"Those who accept my commandments and obey them are the ones who love me. And because they love me, my Father will love them. And I will love them and reveal myself to each of them.”

James 4:8

Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world.

…”you sinners” we all are sinners

Romans 5:8

But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.

1 John 4:9

"God showed how much he loved us by sending his only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him."

This process does not have to be difficult; it just has to be sincere and consistent. Each day, throughout the course of your day, give of yourself to Him, and just as the Word promises, He will respond and you will draw closer to God.

God desires a relationship with you.

EPIC Dating: LOVE (Part 1 of 2)

Love is in the air; that day is coming when attraction will turn to serious love and marriage won't be that far away. So what does a serious relationship between two believers look like?

What are some elements to keep a growing relationship solid?

Before we get off to far on what we do need in a relationship lets look at what we need to avoid in a serious relationship.

You need to avoid:

Compromise
Well we are getting married anyway, and we really love each other, so what does it matter if we get physically involved now. That’s compromise and it’s a road to destruction, and a road that is unholy and ungodly. Don't give in; guard yourself all the way to the alter.

Opportunities to be alone for extended periods of time
Even the Godliest person can mess up (Romans 3:23)

Any relationship can make a quick dumb turn down the wrong road. Don’t think you’re immune and that it can’t happen to you.

Rotating your whole world around that person

Your world does not rotate around a person, it should rotate around God.  That means don’t rotate your schedule around that person, don’t rotate your answers for ministry opportunities around that person: mission trips, church events, camp "if they're not going i'm not going", education and career.

Now some steps that you need to take in your life and in your relationship and some things that you need to continually add to a relationship when you’re at that point in your life to have a serious relationship.

I want you to get to that altar with your purity, a Godly relationship and without any dings, cuts or scars in your life. We're not perfect but God's word is flawless.

1) Accountability

-You need a friend of the same sex, that is godly and pursing Jesus Christ in their own life.

-A friend that has the complete right to get in your face and speak the truth in love to you

-They have the complete right to ask you any question they want to ask you about your personal thoughts, the things you’re doing on dates, the stuff that’s going on in your life.

-They have the right to invade your space and to dig into your personal thoughts and life.

Now I’m not talking about one of those friends that are struggling with the same things too. Because you'll end up just embracing each others weakness and patting each other on the back.  “Its okay we’re just human”

That’s not accountability, I’m talk about someone to tell you that you’re messing up and blowing it.

PS. Your boyfriend or girlfriend is not your accountability partner. (COMPROMISE)

Proverbs 13:20 Walk with the wise and become wise, associate with fools and get in trouble.

Proverbs 9:9 Instruct the wise, and they will be even wiser. Teach the righteous, and they will learn even more.

Proverbs 15:22 Plans go wrong for lack of advice; many advisers bring success.

Proverbs 24:6 So don’t go to war without wise guidance; for victory depends on having many advisers.

Proverbs 11:14 Without wise leadership, a nation falls, there is safety in having many advisers.

2) Prayer and Bible study

You need to pray together.

Opportunity to pray together: Before a date. Before you even start the vehicle. Pray that God blesses the night, that you honor him in all you do, talk about and think about.This is a godly man or woman that would start a date off like this. 

Warning: Some guys have been known to use this as a front:

Let me explain... "Let's read the bible together." Soon the bible reading time turns into a "spiritual make-out session". What started out as a good intentions soon head south. Your focus may be to grow in a intimate relationship with God but soon may be more focused on growing closer physical. Let me remind you again... Guard your heart above all else.

If prayer and bible study with each other heads in this direction its time to back off on the quite time together.

Here’s the deal you need to be have Quite Time on your own. 

Now it’s cool to share what God is teaching you and showing you in your life. And if you want to read your bible together, read it in a place where there are people and you’re not alone.

But the thing is If you are not disciplined enough to spend time alone with God. You will not be disciplined enough to pursue a godly pure relationship.

John 15:5 Jesus said “Apart from me you can do nothing, I am the vine and you are the branches, if you will remain in me and I remain in you, you will produce much fruit, but apart from me you are powerless and you can do nothing

If you want purity in your life, that means personally you have to be leaning hard into God, you have to rely on his strength his power, not your own because if you do you wont succeed.

3) Tons of interaction with each other's families

Believe it or not you are marrying into another family. If you don’t like her family now, you’re not going to like them when you get married. And the same if they don’t like you.

4) Continue to have conversations about life issues:

Career, school/college, ministry, kids (do/don’t want them), where you’re going to live – You need to find out if God is taking your lives in the same direction?  

You may focus your relationship off of physical things later to realize you're not headed in the same direction

5) Continue to learn about the person:

Values, priorities, whether they like:

• To have Fun • Accomplishing Goals • Career • Education • Leadership • Integrity • God • Family • Compassion •Loyalty • Truthfulness • Future Security

6) Don't cut off your friends!

You need friendships because they keep life in perspective and also a safety net if you have to bail out of that relationship.

Congrats Seniors of 2012

Psalm 32:8

The Lord says, “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life.
I will advise you and watch over you."

Proverbs 3:6

Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.

Yes it's that time of the year again. This year is a little different as we have a hand full of graduates that I've grown so close to. It seems just like yesterday that they were starting out in our student ministry, they were still just kids and now they've grown to be young men and women ready to head out into the real world. Just last week I looked at some pictures from past camps and events. There were times we cried together, times we laughed, times we got angry and I had to be a mediator, there were times we prayed, and times I just listened and even times where I told them they just needed to listen. All out of love, I would do anything for these guys.

I look back at the time I met some of them.

I remember meeting Blake, the boy from Chalmette. I remember the difficulties with the storm and the move but several guys quickly befriended him and made Holden his home. Yeah he was just a little guy at that time but I've watched him grow into the man he is today. He learned that God has a plan for everyone, we might not understand it as its playing out but eventually it will become clear. I remember the first time I listened to him share his testimony about how God has placed him here in Holden. I thought for the first time "He's got it" now all you have to do is give him a microphone. Blake, I pray that you draw close to God in these next steps of your life and you let Him continue to guide you through them. His will is best, we just need to trust in where He leads us. Blake, I watched as you headed off to basic training, I remember reading your letter that you sent to me. My heart was so filled with joy as I read how you were in the word and sharing Christ with others while you were there. Continue to do that wherever you go.

Aaron, I really haven't had much time to get to know you,   but you were the guy that went to the church that was doing the book Radical. I remember after you started coming to our youth group, your pastor Trey asked me how you were doing and asked if we were taking care of you. I haven't forgot that, I've taken it as a personal responsibility to make sure you continue to have a relationship with Christ. In saying that, you have people that care about you and your relationship with God. I've had the opportunity to get to know you a little at camp last year and by the way we still have room on the bus for this year! Now you're headed off to join the campus life. I pray that you take your relationship with God with you, and get yourself plugged into a good Christian group at LSU. The LSU BCM is a great group. 

Trey, oh Trey! It’s so funny looking back at your pictures. I remember you coming in with Josh Hathorn as the little kid that could free style rap. You used to be shy back then and it took a while for you to get in front of people and sing. It seems like you've been here forever. I've watched you grow up and move through our youth ministry. I know I've given you plenty advice on girls and life and I pray that you were listening and took it to heart. I won't go any further with that. I know you hear a lot of it and it seems like I'm hard on you at times, but it’s because I love you. I also remember crying together at camp (boy was I a wuss). Na, it’s all good. I think through those times we both grew together knowing that God can comfort and set us free from the things Satan uses to hold us down. Remember that through life, Satan lost that battle but that doesn't mean he won't try again. Remember that whatever life brings you, God can get you through it. Listen to the guidance He brings you. God has also given you a gift to minister with, use it for His glory, praising Him at all times and putting Him first in all you do.

James, I still can't remember the moment you entered our ministry, however I learned quickly that you were my neighbor and it gave me the opportunity to offer you rides to church. Wow, the hours we've had driving and talking as I've gotten to know you. The long talks in the church parking lot and at your house in the driveway. Then you got your license and came puttin' down the road with your mom in the little car. That was a scary sight, but you were growing up! Quickly. You soon started sprouting the "Mott Chops", started to perfect the drums (don't let your head swell too much) and even let me show you the coolness of the fohawk, and then you gathered interest in girls. Oh geez,   that's another subject! You've grown in your relationship with God and you've learned what will trip you up from having that relationship with God. I pray that you stay focused on that relationship. Step back in all cases and ask "God does this please You and will this bring me closer to You?" James, remember to live for Christ; not for the moment.

Tayler, it seems like it has been a short time. Yet it seems like I know you so well. I pray God does amazing things in your life. I've watched a young man accept Christ into his life and run with it. At times I was running to keep up with you, even when I had the opportunity to baptize you. That was the first time I had someone dunk themselves! The joy on your face was priceless though and then you ran out of the water to find your loved ones to give them a hug. I know you have a burden for the lost; those who are dear to you and those that we don't even know. We've cried and prayed for those around us and I will continue to lift them up in my prayers. I've had the chance to disciple you and you've turned that around and started to disciple others. You've started the Man Up group and have those young men engaging into God's word and learning what it is to be a Man of God. We will surely miss you as you move onto the next part of your journey.

Torey, you were in that original bunch with Josh Hathorn and Trey. You've always have been quiet when it comes to getting to know you. But give you the floor to entertain people and you always make us laugh. You love to have a good time even when it comes to the guy's camping trips. I think you learned a valuable lesson that night. But those are times we will remember forever. Torey, I pray God leads you through these next stages of life. I pray that you follow Him as well. You as well have a talent and gift for music; use it for the glory of God.

Angela, our Miss Independent Firecracker! I've told you time and time again that you remind me of Anna. Yeah y'all have some characteristics that yall share but you're Angela. I can't help but remember you as coming into the youth ministry as Trey's girlfriend. I looked at a picture the other day of you when you had your blonde hair and braces. Yes, I know I brought up the past but you were so young and as I look at some of our Junior High Girls now I wonder if one day I'll be referencing your name to them...."You remind me so much of Angela" Yeah that's just weird! Maybe life won't bring you to far away and I can let you talk to them. Angela, I know we've talked plenty of times about how life plays out and how some of the things God has for us will always be a mystery. But I think through these times He is there to lead us and make us stronger. Continue to follow God, put Him as the top priority in your life and everything else He will work out.

Jessica, I met you at the lunch room table at the school one day. I imagine you were probably thinking "Who is this guy and what does he want?" But you were all smiles and friendly as can be. Later, through Amanda I realized you were the older sister of the bunch. And then we just started seeing more of you. Jessica, you've always had something special about you, and then I realized it was Christ living inside. He's given you a gift to lead others and you've taken on the task of our girls in our youth group. Through the past 7 years I haven't seen many students take something and claim it as theirs. But through this I've seen the passion and heart you have for these girls, our youth group and God. I'm not sure where your journey may lead you, but I know God will use you in wonderful ways.

Sara, you've always been quiet. I remember you as the little girl in the children Christmas plays and even the pictures we found of you at VBS with your white hair and rosy cheeks. I started to get to know you and your sidekick Sarah as yall got comfortable in our youth ministry. Then I started praying for you, something was missing about you and it came out to be a true relationship with God. This past summer, God answered those prayers and placed it upon your heart to get right with Him. What a joy it was to have part in God's plan and to be there to help you in that part of life. I know your sister and I have prayed for you and continue to pray for you as you continue in your relationship with Christ. The next steps ahead in your journey of life will be interesting and I pray that you let Christ continue to lead you. I know your sister will be there whenever you need her and she sets a good example to follow. I'm excited to see where God will lead you.

Chelsey, I think I've known you the longest. Your brothers were starting out in the youth group and you were just a little girl in CC's children’s class. I remember every Wednesday bringing y'all home. I've had the opportunity to watch all of you grow up and I've also walked through a lot of life's ups and downs with you. I remember the first time you went to camp. You would have thought we took you from your mom and told you that you'd never see her again!   I remember staying with you that entire first day and after dinner you coming to me and telling me that I could go now. I remember that you taught me the correct way to do the "Cobra" and now I use that illustration in my sermons. I've seen those eyes roll plenty of times. I know life has thrown some curve balls at you, but keep your head up and continue to follow Christ.

Yall have all been a big part of our life and we want you to know that we will always be here for you. I'll always claim you as my own. I was told awhile back when I started in the ministry that "You're a minister to them not a friend". Let me say this, its hard not to be friend to a group that you care for and love so much. Wherever the journey of life may take you, always stay in touch with us. I want to continue to watch and help you grow in Christ wherever you might be. I want to see you succeed in your careers and one day marriage. It’s been a journey and definitely a blessing!

Your Minister and Friend,

Matthew

One last thing. I ask that you pass the torch.

For the past several years I've taken the light that is living in me and have passed it to you. Through Christ living in me, I've taught, discipled, ministered, listened and loved. I ask that you turn that around and do the same to others that you may cross paths with. Leave a great impression on them, not for your own glory but for the glory of God.

Matthew 5:14-16

“You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

Philippians 2:12-18

Dear friends, you always followed my instructions when I was with you. And now that I am away, it is even more important. Work hard to show the results of your salvation, obeying God with deep reverence and fear. For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.

Do everything without complaining and arguing, so that no one can criticize you. Live clean, innocent lives as children of God, shining like bright lights in a world full of crooked and perverse people. Hold firmly to the word of life; then, on the day of Christ’s return, I will be proud that I did not run the race in vain and that my work was not useless. But I will rejoice even if I lose my life, pouring it out like a liquid offering to God, just like your faithful service is an offering to God. And I want all of you to share that joy. Yes, you should rejoice, and I will share your joy.

EPIC Dating: Practical Tactics (Part 2 of 2)

Last week we looked at 3 groups of people for when it comes down to a relationship and dealing with dating & sex.

What we need to understand is that our body is made to go all the way.

Even if we have drawn the line at a point in your relationship your body is ready to move on.

It starts with…

-Hand Holding: You know the tag game, finger flicking, the hand nudging, the touch, leave the hand hanging and lock! It happens; your body’s engine has just started.

Then you’re holding hands under the jacket, then not with the jacket, and walking around holding hands.

And when you start with the next persons: boyfriend or girlfriend, you’ll be amazed that you skip the hand holding game and you go straight to holding hands.

WHY? Because your body is already started up. RPM’S!

-The same with The Kiss: it may have taken months to get that kiss but after that, the next girlfriend or boyfriend, it’s like the 2^nd date.

Why? Because your body is already idling at that level, so after that first kiss the RPM’S are REVVING UP!

Your body moves on and the problem is you’ll always pick up where you left off with the next boyfriend or girlfriend. 

That engine never turns OFF

Your “line” with your current relationship will be your starting point with your next.

We already talked about the spiritual reasons to stay pure now you just need to understand how the body works.

We need to realize that we’re about 4 times weaker than we think. We’ve already talked the first night about how you have no control over your heart, now you need to know that your body is just as hard to control.

The further you go / the faster you go
The further you go / the harder it is to go back

Some Advice:

• Plan your time

(Have A Plan) Spare time will kill you.

All you need is 45 minutes before the show starts and you’re in trouble.

If your goal is to worship God with your relationship and life you need to start planning.

• Date in Groups 

But don't group date with others that don't have that focus of purity.

Group date with Christians that are willing to hold you responsible. If not it will just be a couples make out session.

• Stay away from “alone time”

How many still think renting movies is a good idea? 

Home by yourselves is a bad idea, you’re going to mess up. Even if your parents let you have the living room to watch movies.

1 Corinthians 10:13

The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure.

He gives you away of escape, but some wait till it’s too late, you’ve missed it.

Plan ahead listen to the advice

• Don’t ditch your friends

Everyone’s cool till all you do is give all your time/attention to this one person

• Don’t ditch your family

They care about you and want to have a relationship with you also.

Your boyfriend or girlfriend might be part of your family one day let your parents get to know them now.

• Walk with Jesus & Let God complete you

The reason marriages aren’t working is because people think there is a person out there that will complete them, we have emptiness in our lives and were looking for someone to complete us. God never attend for someone to complete you, that is what He does. When He fills your heart you can poor that into someone.

So before you get into a relationship you have to be willing to walk with Jesus.

Your own personal relationship with Christ; not the youth groups Jesus, not the minister’s Jesus, your own Jesus. You have to seek out that relationship.

Suggestions of Letting God Complete You

James: 1

Philippians 4:8

And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.

Galatians 6:7-10

Don’t be misled—you cannot mock the justice of God. You will always harvest what you plant. Those who live only to satisfy their own sinful nature will harvest decay and death from that sinful nature. But those who live to please the Spirit will harvest everlasting life from the Spirit. So let's not get tired of doing good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don't give up. Therefore, whenever we have the opportunity, we should do good to everyone - especially to those in the family of faith.

Feed Your spirit: Fellowship / Worship / Time with God / Ministry

1 Corinthians 6:18-20

Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.

THEREFORE HONOR GOD WITH YOUR RELATIONSHIP AS WELL

EPIC Dating: Practical Tactics (Part 1 of 2)

James 1:5

If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.

Why would someone be doubled minded for asking and not believing?

If you don’t believe then why even ask.

Think about:“God please help me with this but you probably won’t”, Or “Lord I’m praying because that's what my pastor  told me to do.”

Do you really expect any outcome!

Are you confident when you ask, when you pray?

VS 5 If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.

When God gives us answers, wisdom do we listen?

That’s what this dating series is about, but if we're double minded we may be missing it!

What I see in teenagers when it comes down to relationships and dealing with sex & dating is 3 groups of people:

-Don’t Care Group,  If I love them it’s Okay Group,  &  Show me the line Group

1)- Don’t Care Group is the ones that don’t care who they hurt, who they use or who they rob. They’re even willing to hurt themselves. Pleasure seeking and with selfish desires and that’s all that matters.

2)- If I love them it’s ok Crowd

Do we use this word "love" to freely when we may not really know what its about?

I believe in some cases this word is misused. Especially in dating.

What happens is we get these selfish desires and we want bring this relationship to the physical. So what do we do? We justify and convince ourselves that "I love you" makes it okay to move forward. 

But if you really think about it this is what you’re saying:

a. I love you so much I’m willing for you to get pregnant or a disease

b. I love you so much I’m willing for you to have a bad reputation

c. I love you so much I’m willing for you to regret this for the rest of your life

BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!

If someone tells you they love you so lets go do this thing, they don’t want to do this thing because they love you.  They want to do this because they love themselves. They’ve just had these ideas running through their head and they just need a body to do them with and if "I Love you" works then lets call it love.

What is Love? Do we really know and understand Love?

This is what I think we think love is: Love is the biggest, most extreme feeling we’ve every felt for a person up to that moment.

I say this because what happens is we spend time with a person and get close to them and we have this feeling….

All warm inside, butterflies  and we think “It must be love”  but it’s really just gas..

So what’s LOVE? (Webster's) strong affection for another arising out of personal ties, -attraction based on sexual desire: affection and tenderness felt by lovers, -affection based on admiration or common interests,

Wait don’t you have to spend more than a couple weeks or months with someone to truly know their interest? Yet we through out love within days/weeks of dating.

(Webster's continue) -warm attachment or devotion, -unselfish loyal concern for the good of another: as the fatherly concern of God for humankind, brotherly concern for others or a person's adoration of God, -to hold dear, to feel affection or experience desire (remember "unselfish loyal concern for the good of another" that means Love is not about your selfish desires)

So we think we know what this love thing is, later to realize we didn’t have it at all.

So if thats the case, then the “If I Love them, It's Ok Crowd” is pretty dangerous.

3- Show me the Line Crowd (how far is to far)

 When you start experimenting with the where’s the line it will soon affect your relationship.

1-     You have the possibility of going into sex  before marriage (Because we have defined “sex” as something else, but sex/impurity is more than intercourse)

2-     In a relationship you’ll start to talk less, Not trust each other. Because now your opening to things, you've let down your guard and your looking at other people. And when you get married it’s baggage and you’ll have to deal with it.

              

The attitude Christians have in this group: 

Well if sex is bad, we’ll just find a spot in the middle where it’s okay….

Just show me the line, How far is too far...

We’re looking for the line, we want to know where it’s at.

Why? So we can stay far away from it, right?

No, because we want to get all on top of it without crossing it.

But if you’re living your life on a cliff, it won’t take long to fall off a cliff. If you're living on the line you are living on the line of a sexual relationship.

So you ask where’s the line? 

Picture it this way, your wife or husband is out there dating someone right now. How do you want them to be treat.  They’re making decisions about dating and relationships too – where do you want them to draw the line?

So what I think is the how far is too far crowd is head for the same stuff as the if I love them it’s okay crowd.

May take a little longer to get there but headed for the same place.

And the Results: Guilt / No trust / Pregnancy / Future Marriage Problems / Brokeness / Impure

Take a stand for your purity, its better to have a plan now than to get out in the dating world to realize you need to make a quick decision. And most of all pray for that wisdom that God generously gives.
Next week we'll look at some tactics to the dating world.