EPIC Dating: Myths of Dating (Part 4 of 4)

Myth #4: It’s nothing serious we’re just dating.

• Have you ever heard someone say,

“We just go out for fun”  or  “I’d never get serious with him”.

Thing is you don’t have a whole lot of control over who you fall for.

- All it takes is the right words, her head on your shoulder during the chick flick, hand in the popcorn at the same time, that glance into each others eyes, and BAM! You’re falling for them.

- You think it takes a movie? Try church camp…That’s why we separate you on the bus.    

   Six hrs sitting beside each other on a bus and you come back home engaged.

“But hey it’s nothing physical”

Well lets get physical…
Your goofing around on the couch during a movie night (by the way is one of the most dangerous date nights ever) Parents are crazy (mine included) if they think their kid needs their dating space and leaves them alone in the Living Room or allows access to the bedroom.

The “tickle/flirting/wrestling” match begins, “hehehe”.
Then before you know it, both hands have join the “so innocent game”.
Before you know you’ve embraced her in your arms, your eyes have met, and BAM!
You go in for the kiss! Or she smacks the crap out of you for trying that.

-Maybe you find this as not a bad thing,
ITS NOTHING SERIOUS, WE'RE JUST DATING.

Let me give you the definition of what these “tickle/flirting/wrestling’ games are.

Webster Dictionary: An action or behavior that precedes an event.
YEAH WCW SMACK DOWN! Right?...

WRONG!...

Webster's Dictionary continued: usually include compliments, subtle comments and intimate conversations, they can include provocative clothing and gestures, suggestive postures and motions,  standing or being inside a partner's personal space, and holding a gaze longer than would be expected from only a casual interest.

Webster's Dictionary: actions preceding sexual intercourse

The word defined is FOREPLAY, sounds alot like that little game to me

This is for married people, and yet many dating relationships toy around with this game. Yet we say it’s nothing serious. This is playing at the door step of a sexual relationship!

But Honestly: What’s the risk?
The possibilities of a physical dating relationship?
What’s the bases of Dating? If you start off on first base in your Junior High Years and advance one base each year, where do you expect your relationship to be in a few years?
Do you think it would be godly? Years later there's a possibility that you've been around the bases a few times and possibly with different relationships. Most probably broken.

This isn't the qualities you want to have. Someone that literally "Gets Around"

• So what we need is to be careful who those choices are --- or who you let choose you.

Does it matter if I date a believer or non-believer? Think about God’s Standards

2 Corinthians 6:14-17

Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? What harmony can there be between Christ and the devil? How can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever?  And what union can there be between God’s temple and idols? For we are the temple of the living God.

As God said: “I will live in them and walk among them. I will be their God, and they will be my people. Therefore, come out from among unbelievers, and separate yourselves from them, says the LORD.  Don’t touch their filthy things, and I will welcome you.

The Bible is not saying don’t talk with them or you can’t be their friend, if that were the case we’d all be lost. Some Christian took the time to share Christ with us. But guard you heart, your emotions, & your bodies be careful who you link yourself to.

As a believer, you are made up of Body, Soul, and Spirit. If you are not a believer you’re spiritually dead. A believer and non-believer’s relationship can never be a complete relationship. This doesn’t make you a better person, just one that knows God and one that doesn’t know Him. Their relationship can never be a complete relationship. They can only have things in common physically or mentally. 2/3rds  You may have things in common but a spiritual relationship won’t work. You will either split ways, fall back or fall in.

Now I know you’re intentions are “I’ll save them”.

Great!

-Your passion for the lost is wonderful but do you need to date them at the same time?

This will only get in the way and it’s dangerous.

-And are you only “Getting them saved” so you can date them?
Just some questions to ask your self.

*I can promise you God is not going to bless your circumstances when your intentions are focused on getting a girlfriend or boyfriend. He knows the truth.

Fall Back/ Fall In : If you’re a believer…

Fall in means you know how to live your old sinful life, it wont take much to fall back into your old ways. We already know how to have a sinful life (we’re experienced). They have no idea how to have a spiritual life and whats scary is you might not either, you may not be aware of how that relationship works either!  The problem is it’s much easier to just fall in to your old ways.

When you’re not complete and married to a non-believer there will be decisions:

– big decisions like where to live, what job to work, how to raise children, you would be the only one desiring to please God and do what is right in His eyes if you were married to an unbeliever. The problem is you’ll probably just give in after awhile or split ways.

2 Corinthians 4:18

So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.

Marriage is Forever, a union under God between man and woman and God needs to be in both lifes. If not there will be problems later.

We can’t see the big picture, but its so important for your date/partner to be a believer, someone with your standards that you’ve set.
Don’t let the charm get you now and Don’t settle!
Because that’s your future and those things will last forever!

There would be major conflict in a life of a believer if you didn’t recognize these things now.

The person you link yourself to in a relationship says volumes about your walk with God!!!

Who you date does matter. .
I hope you just didn’t hear a bunch of rules. I hope what you heard is that God has guidelines & principles for relationships.

To have a godly relationship and marriage it’s important to take these and apply them to your life.

EPIC Dating: Myths of Dating (Part 3 of 4)

Myth #3: As long as I don’t get physically involved my serious dating relationships won’t affect my marriage

When you share your heart and love with someone with no boundaries it can damage your future marriage’s capacity for intimacy not as severe as sex before marriage but just as real. You’ll give your heart away.

Proverbs 4:23  

Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.

You can’t approach a relationship full on without restraint.

Limits / Boundaries

There should always be that boundary in your mind and heart where you draw the line and say:

“I will not give my heart away until the day at the altar, until then I will leave it completely in the hands of the one I can trust and that I will never break up with and wont break up with me – Jesus.

Ask God to guard your heart. If you don’t you’ll find someone to give your heart to over and over again.

In the constant dating world we’re sharing our heart with everyone and we’re broken because we have no boundaries.

If you give pieces of your heart away here’s the damage that it can have in marriage one day.

You’ll walk into marriage with the only person whom you should have given that level of emotion and love and mind and heart but it’s not all intact.

Parts of your thoughts and love are scattered to those other guys or girls.

You have been emotionally intimate with someone else.

You’ve given your Love, Feelings & Time and You want to give your whole heart to that one but you can’t because you dated seriously over and over again giving your heart away.

If you think a serious dating relationship is okay just because you don’t get physical, but giving your heart and emotions away is okay. You’re actually saying or claiming that marriage revolves only around a physical / sexual relationship. That it has nothing to do with your love, emotions, mind or heart.

The truth is your emotions, your mind, your heart, your love and your bodies are meant for your future husband or wife. Those things are NOT meant to be shared with everyone in the fish bowl. Just the one with the heart for you!

Keep it guarded. It means you need to find your acceptance and love in Christ not boyfriends and girlfriends. Without a love relationship with Christ you will dive into relationships with no emotional boundaries.

Christ is the only one that can fill that void in your life and in your heart.

Romans 5:1-5

Therefore, since we have been made right in God’s sight by faith, we have peace with God because of what Jesus Christ our Lord has done for us. Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into this place of undeserved privilege where we now stand, and we confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God’s glory. We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.

Ever Considered Pulling The Plug?

Proverbs 4:23
Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.

This is a scripture that we will go over again and again during our Epic Dating Series, but today as I read a parenting devotion this scripture didn't apply to dating. It applied to my family and the hearts of my two sons, the heart of my wife and my own.

"Imagine inviting a stranger into your home for two or three hours every day to tell your children all about a perverse world where violence solves problems and all anyone needs to be happy is the right beer, a fast car, good looks, and lots of sex." According to Dr. Victor Strasburger, chief of the division of adolescent medicine at the University of New Mexico's School of Medicine, that is exactly what happens when parents use television as the baby-sitter and do not monitor what their children watch.

--NLT Parenting Devotion

Now honestly I know we wouldn’t invite a stranger in to our homes and let this happen. But as head of my household I physically picked up the TV, bought it with my money and placed it in my home. Don't get me wrong, television is entertaining, but is it taking over the hearts of our children? Is it taking the place of quality family time? Is it teaching our children things of this world when we should be the ones teaching and guiding them?

Dr. Strasburger said: "Ninety percent of the programming is detrimental to your child's health, and it is a scary business. . . . America has the worst television for children and adolescents in the world . . . We have to instruct parents better about what the effects of television are and how they can mediate against those harmful effects."

In addition to the poor content of most television shows, the amount of time that children spend in front of TV is also a great problem--23 to 27 hours a week by the average child. That is 23 to 27 hours that they are not outside playing, not reading books, not riding bicycles, not exercising, and so forth.

According to Strasburger, for many years the television networks and parents have been blaming each other. But both are at fault, and both can make changes. Obviously, the television networks can produce better shows.

But parents should also get involved. Instead of using the television as a convenient baby-sitter, they should get involved with their kids, playing with them and directing them into creative uses of their free time. Parents should monitor the shows their kids watch. And they should have the courage to change channels or turn the TV off when something inappropriate, offensive, or wrong comes on. They could even put the entire family on a TV diet, limiting viewing to a few hours a week.

--NLT Parenting Devotion

Believe it or not, once you limit or just turn off the TV you'll eventually remember how to communicate with each other. Yeah you'll have withdrawals (especially if you have your weekly shows) but you'll make it and eventually not desire it. You'll also realize that the home will get a lot less chaotic now that the background noise is gone. But most of all you'll have a chance to fold up the TV trays and sit down with your family at the dining room table. You'll have a chance to spend some time playing with your children, or having a conversation with your wife, or even some time with God. That time spent with them is precious time that will impact their lives in a tremendous way. I've decided to blog on this devotion because this is something we did a few weeks ago. Yeah it was weird when I came home from work and the TV was off and the doors were shut to the TV cabinet. I actually asked my wife what was going on. Now understand I’m not trying to get the whole world anti-television but the facts are true. These things are influencing our children and family, and it’s our jobs as fathers/parents to guard our children's hearts. If we don’t do it the world will do it for you. I challenge you to take a break from the tube and evaluate your household. Take a day or a weekend and spend some quality time with your family. It’s time to pull the plug and plug into them.

Thought this was interesting...

Publication Date: April 12, 1984

(When Mama Bear decides her family spends too much time in front of the TV, she bans it for a week. Then the Bear family finds other ways to have fun and keep busy, so they watch less when TV is allowed again--and they don't even miss it.)

EPIC Dating: Myths of Dating (Part 2 of 4)

Myth #2: No one would ever like the Real you so you have to Impress them.

This is called dating: we put on a show and even get made up for it. Make up, new clothes, cool attitude, WHAT WE THINK THEY WOULD LIKE…

But what about the real you?

That’s who you need to be. If not they’ll marry a fake or a bad actor and eventually you'll have to figure each other out.

But what do we do to Impress, how do we really look with our attempt?

How we impress the opposite sex and the games we play:

Flirting Games We Play: they actually started along time ago...

1. They started in Elementary: Passed notes that said Check Yes or No
2. As you got older girls you started writing notes. You know that special fold with the heart drew on the outside. And on the inside you wrote things like Carley loves“?”. What a tease! And then of course you got the guy asking “Well who do you like?”
3. The Middle Man Approach. I'm sure everyone has used the middle man. Then the wrath of the middle man, Ouch! A friendship buster.
4. Pick Up lines (here's a few funny ones)

             -Just what I thought "Made in Heaven." 

-My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can’t hold it in.

-If you were a booger I’d pick you first   
-Is it a sin that you stole my heart.?

-Hi the voices in my head told me to come over here and talk to you.

-I know I don’t have a chance, but I just wanted to hear an angel talk.

The pick up line is probably one of the biggest things we try when trying to impress someone. They're funny but lame!

We asked Girls what guys do to try to impress:

•Guys think girls want a guy who acts Cool and Macho, you think you have to be unaffected by the things around you. And if that doesn’t work you think just acting goofy is your back up.

•Another way guys try to impress is by showing off (yeah your muscles are attractive to some girls but are probably outweighed by your Cool/Macho attitude) That only works in Twilight.

•And talking about romantic movies: Guys think they have to be all romantic to impress, however some ladies like the romantic guy just not overly romantic.  

•Another attempt to impress is guys think picking and being mean is flirting.

ATTENTION: This does not impress girls.

AND I QUOTE “We’re not impressed when you poke us, call us names, or aggravate us. This just tells us you are an attention getter and annoying.”

ACTUAL ATTEMPTS BY GUYS (what guys said): Work Out, cut off shirts/shirtless, fashion/dress cool, over the top stunts/showing off, good dancer/hip hop, athletic, sweet/romantic, smooth talker, pay the girl’s way, pimp my ride/rims/bass, clingy, AXE cologne.

Truth of the Matter: What Girls really want…

•A nice guy that listens when they speak, not just hears them but listens.

•A guy that is sweet and has a good personality willing to spend simple time with me.

•A honest guy and knows how to be himself but one that isn’t all into himself.

•A guy that is willing to ask “How was your day or How are you”

•A poem or a letter from you. Yeah you can keep your man card if you do this!

• Girls want a guy who is affected by things. Guys who enjoy life, engage in worship, involved in meaningful friendships. They want a guy that is respectful, kind, compassionate, and godly. Someone who is on a greater adventure, than just trying to hook up with their next date.

We asked Guys what girls do to try to impress:

• Girls think guys want a girl who is “ditsy”. In other words just trying to  act cute and not themselves.

• Girls think guys want a “bomchickbombom” girl.  So they wear skimpy clothes and aren’t modest.

▪ Girls think they have to hit you, be touchy, they think they have to be all over you.

▪ Girls think they have to ignore their friends and make you center of their attention.

 (this is a dating no no. Do you want to turn the world against you? Every friend will dislike your relationship)

ACTUAL ATTEMPTS BY GIRLS (what girls said): Smile, flirty, giggle, give the guy compliments, talk about what he’s into, set standards and explain your faith(awesome!), just be herself, show him you’re confident, cook for him, be funny, appearance: makeup, hair, clothing

Truth of the Matter: What Guys really want...

▪ Guys are not looking to marry a girl who reveals everything by the way they dress. They may date a girl like that because they are thinking she’s “easy”, but they are looking for a modest girl to marry.

▪They want a girl to be herself, they want a honest girl, one that has self respect, one that is beautiful and has self confidence and doesn’t care what others think.
▪They want a girl that loves them, one that’s caring and is kind to them. They also want a girl that loves God and that is able to think for herself.
▪They want a girl that can cook and can be funny.

Genesis 1:31
Then God looked over all he had made, and he saw that it was very good!

Romans 12:6

In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well.

So we need to recognize that we are all different. You don't have to be the description given above, because their is someone out there that will love you for being you.

But don't you think we need to stop pretending or trying to live up to what the world is telling us we need to be?
We need to stop making our lives an ongoing struggle and just be who we are.
Why do we need to impress people?
God made you who you are, so be yourself, everyone else is taken.

And most of all know that God loves you!

EPIC Dating: Myths of Dating (Part 1 of 4)

Myth #1: You have to date around to find the "Right" one.

Getting hooked up with the “right one” right person doesn’t happen by trying on every relationship possible until you find the right fit.

(Illustration: Trying on jeans) A relationship isn't jeans

You and I as believers need to focus more on our relationship with God and His forming us into the “right one” so when we do meet that person God has for us we don’t miss out.

Appearance Vs Inside:

There are people that you’re attracted to everywhere – only one with the heart. Yet we’re trying to find that heart out of our lustful desires

Only God can make that known to you, you can’t figure that out by yourself.  But we try all the time and we have no idea what we’re looking for, so we need to pick up our Bibles:

Guys your bible tells you what a great wife should be (gentle, kind, serving, modest, compassionate, honorable, respected, humble, godly, and pure)

Girls your bibles tells you what you are looking for in a man (righteous, godly, self-controlled, respectable, servant of God and people, courageous leader, gentle not violent, steady not wishy-washy, compassionate, prayerful (Tim Tebo) So when its time for a guy to ask you out, check him out good.

Pull out your checklist and see if they compare.

(1 Peter 3:1-12,1 Corinthians 13:4-7, 2 Corinthians 6:14-15, Psalms 1:1-3)

There’s a huge list to go by. And it’s flawless.

(Illustration: My dating life)

(Not going to tell you not to date, I dated & married my HS Girlfriend)

(1 in million chance, it doesn’t happen to everyone)

Yes it’s true that at some point you will go out with the person you are going to marry, but that is not the magic formula for finding the right person. But with the biblical standards that we just read wouldn’t you prefer the people in your fish tank to at least have these qualities?

Think about the people you date now. What kind of qualities do they have? That’s your fish tank, you’ll marry those qualities unless you start seeking what God has for you. And if you don’t have those Godly qualities yourself, get on board, not so you can find a boy or a girl but so you can find Christ and let him fill all your needs and lead a big part of your life.

Matthew 6:33

Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.

Don’t misunderstand the scripture though... This doesn’t mean sit and meditate & a man or woman will appear. You will have to pursue. In a godly way open your eyes and be ready for what God puts in your path. (But keep it pure!)

(Illustration: Run the race with God as your focus and at some point He will tell you to look at your side)

Proverbs 4:23

Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.

So is that person in my life now?

How do I sort through my options WITHOUT playing the dating game?

1. Friendships.

Evaluate their relationships with you and other friends, especially when you’re not around. Ask about them and get the inside scoop from a reliable source.

2. Watch how they interact with their mom and dad. (respectful?)

 -Guys that smart off to their moms, girls he’s going to treat you like that girls.

-Girls that sneak around their parents, maybe on a date with you. Don’t be surprise if she’s willing to be sneaky around you. While you’re dating or worse case: when you’re married.

-Check out their relationships, relationship skills are more important than kissing skills, goats know how to kiss.

3. Keep a safe distance for your heart’s sake.

Being close friends isn’t bad. Long-term friendship is an option. Besides you’ll get to know someone before you invest emotional into them. If they’re not willing to put the time in, then they’re not thinking of you, just themselves! Usually you can find someone’s true intentions by this. Girl if the guy is truly interested in you and a future with you he’ll stick around and respect the “friends only”, if not there’s a good chance he’ll wonder off. THIS IS A SIGN!

4. Pray for insight and wisdom

–This can be tricky!

Church Answer you don’t like: “Pray about it”

And Our prayer shouldn’t be “God she’s so hot, please let me go out with her”

Let God lead you, not your hormones or emotions.

Have godly wisdom and Evaluate them. This is judging. And you better do it.

Its your life, your emotions, your heart, & your marriage. You are trying to understand a person’s spiritual condition, personality, and motives. 

-Check them out with God’s insight and wisdom, He won’t let you down.

5. Ask God to make is crystal clear quickly

You can waste your life, your time, and heart on the wrong person. Ask God if this relationship needs to be anything besides a friendship. Also be willing to accept the answer.

You don’t have to date around to find the "Right" one.  With some of the things we talked about tonight you can find that right one without giving a piece of your heart, your emotions, or yourself away. I encourage you to think about this and apply it to your dating life.

God's Love Letter To You

The words you are about to experience are true…
They will change your life if you let them, for they come from the very heart of God. He loves you and He is the Father you have been looking for all your life.

This is His love letter to you:

My child,
You may not know Me, but I know everything about you ^{Psalm 139:1}
I know when you sit down and when you rise up ^{Psalm 139:2}
I am familiar with all your ways ^{Psalm 139:3}
Even the very hairs on your head are numbered ^{Matthew 10:30}
For you were made in My image ^{Genesis 1:27}

In me, you live and move and have your being ^{Acts 17:27-28}
For you are my offspring ^{Acts 17:28}
I knew you even before you were conceived ^{Jeremiah 1:4-5}

I chose you, when I planned creation ^{Ephesians 1:11-12}
You were not a mistake,
for all your days are written in my book ^{Psalm 139:15-16}
I determined the exact time of your birth,
and where you would live ^{Acts 17:26}
You are fearfully and wonderfully made ^{Psalm 139:14}
I knit you together in you mother’s womb ^{Psalm 139:13}
And brought you forth on the day you were born ^{Psalm 71:6}

I have been misrepresented by those who do not know me ^{John 8:41, 42, 44}
I am not distant and angry,
but am the complete expression of love ^{1 John 4:16}
And it is my desire to lavish my love on you ^{1 John 3:1}
Simply because you are my child, and I am your Father ^{1 John 3:1}
I offer you more that your earthly father ever could ^{Matthew 7:11}
For I am the perfect Father ^{Matthew 5:48}

Every good gift that you receive, comes from my hand ^{James 1:17}
For I am your provider, and I meet all your needs ^{Matthew 6:31-33}
My plan for your future has always been filled with hope ^{Jeremiah 29:11}
Because I love you with an everlasting love ^{Jeremiah 31:3}

My thoughts towards you are countless
as the sand on the seashore ^{Psalm 139:17-18}
And I rejoice over you with singing ^{Zephaniah 3:17}
I will never stop doing good to you ^{Jeremiah 32:40}
For you are my treasured possession ^{Exodus 19:5}

I desire to establish you with all my heart, and all my soul ^{Jeremiah 32:41}
And I want to show you great and marvelous things ^{Jeremiah 33:3}
If you seek me with all your heart, you will find me ^{Deuteronomy 4:29}
Delight in me, and I will give you the desires of your heart ^{Psalm 37:4}
For it is I, who gave you those desires ^{Philippians 2:13}
I am able to do more for you than you could possibly imagine ^{Ephesians 3:20-21}
For I am your greatest encourager ^{Thessalonians 2:16-17}

I am also the Father who comforts you in all your troubles ^{2 Corinthians 1:3-4}
When you are broken hearted, I am close to you ^{Psalm 34:18}
As a Sheppard carries a lamb, I have carried you close to my heart ^{Isaiah 40:11}
One day, I will wipe away every tear from your eyes ^{Revelation 21:3-4}
And I’ll take away all the pain
you have suffered on this earth ^{Revelation 21:3-4}

I am your Father, and I love you even as I love my Son, Jesus ^{John 17:23}
For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed ^{John 17:26}
He is the exact representation of my being ^{Hebrews 1:3}
He came to demonstrate that I am for you, not against you ^{Romans 8:31}
And to tell you that I am not counting your sins ^{2 Corinthians 5:18-19}
Jesus died, so that you and I could be reconciled ^{2 Corinthians 5:18-19}
His death was the ultimate expression of my love for you ^{1 John 4:10}
I gave up everything that I loved that I might gain your love ^{Romans 8:31-32}
If you receive the gift of my son Jesus, you receive Me ^{1 John 2:23}
And nothing will ever separate you from my love again ^{Romans 8:38-39}

Come home, and I’ll throw the biggest party heaven has ever seen ^{Luke 15:7}
I have always been Father, and will always be Father ^{Ephesians 3:14-15}

My question is: Will you be my child? ^{John 1:12-13}
I am waiting for you… ^{Luke 15:11-24
                                                                 ...GOD}

The EPIC Dating Series Begins _INTRO

Hey just wanted to post the sermon notes from dating series incase anyone missed it or wanted to come back to what we talked about. This past Wednesday was just an Intro to the dating series so I've taken the notes and wrote them out alittle more. I'll try to post each weeks notes on the blog so you can follow along. Feel free to comment, leave questions or even pass them along to a friend. We'd also love to see you on Wednesday nights if you can make it!
So......HERE WE GO!

Epic Dating (Intro)                                        

Have you ever seen an Epic movie? You know the best of the best; maybe it was love, drama, action packed or just straight up legendary. Well that's kind of where we're going with this series. As those were epic in their own way we'll focus on Epic Relationships, Love, Marriage, and Sex. 

But let's look at what Mr. Merriam Webster thinks of the word...

EPIC:

A: extending beyond the usual or ordinary especially in size or scope

B: HEROIC

1: a long narrative poem in elevated style recounting the deeds of a legendary or historical hero

2: a work of art

Now how we see it in our Dating Series and how it relates to the definition.

EPIC:

A: We'll look at the entire picture, nothing left out: from what the world says dating is to what its not, to things like getting serious (you know those words that we're embarrassed to say in front of people or our parents), to the ultimate love you can have for someone.

B: The kind of Love that can fulfill you and can only be found in Christ Jesus. Heroic? Yes! He layed down his life for you and me. (No this love isn't like Titanic where Jack gives Rose the door to float on while he froze to death. She could have slid over and saved him as well.  Or Edward stopping the out of control van from smashing Bella in Twilight.)

1: Best selling book of all time. It’s called the Bible, God's love letter to us.

Now it may not tell you the best pick up lines or every detail of dating but as we open it up, we'll hear what love is all about and how it will help us in a our dating relationships and ultimately marriage.

2: Created in His Image, we are made perfect, male and female. God created us percect and that's art!

Other works of art…well His creation of marriage was an art, God did conducted the first marriage ceremony in the garden. As for sex; well he educated Adam on that as well. So not only is it a work of art it’s Epic!

But does the bible talk of love beyond Creation of Adam & Eve and the Love of Christ….

Yes it does because the whole thing is a love letter.

(I'll post the composed love letter to prove my point on a different post)

But to get into the hot and heavy stuff we went straight to the book...Song of Solomon 

I actually read it from my phone with out telling the students where it came from. I've never seen so many blushing faces before. Some must of thought I was reading from one of those romance novels but their jaws dropped when I told them it was from the bible.

So why is this in the Bible? Well God created sex in a marriage so it’s the world that made it a bad thing. Sex was pure before the world got ahold of it and took it out of marriage. This was just their expression of love, now days its explicit language.

 We ended the night with what the Dating Series is not about!

1)This is not a series about how dating is bad.

2)This is not a series about how if you have sex before marriage you will burn in hell… That’s a Myth

3)This is not a series of me telling you to break up with you boyfriend or girlfriend, I want to tell you how to have a successful relationship with that person.

4)This is not a series to learn how far you can go in a relationship before it becomes sex. If that’s what you're looking for there's a good chance you've already crossed that line. But this is a series that will explain how through Christ we can get those things straight.

5)This is not a series that will point out people and say one is better than the other because of their purity or impurity: Honestly we're all impure...

1 Corinthians 6:18  Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.

Galatians 5:19-21 When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.

Matthew 5:28 But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

2 Timothy 2:22  So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.

Romans 3:23  For all have sinned and falling short of the glory of God

Well that wraps up the first night, hope you stay connected to see what else God has instore for us during this Dating Series. Remember, feel free to leave a comment or question.